Musings

Father and Son

I’m 64 but I feel a bit like I did as a kid on Christmas eve. I’m so anticipating my upcoming visit with James, Cristen and kids – two whole months! And a possible trip to the Bahamas in the middle of that .

I’m sitting here on the chaise portion of Jessica’s couch, under a wonderful crazy quilt that was made by Scott’s 90 something year old grandma. It’s multi colored, multi patterned, lined with fleece and soooo warm. If she can do something like that, I can finish my book! And do some of my own sewing as well.

Jessica’s dog, Ginger, is asleep on the chair, while my dog, Chaz is asleep in Ginger’s bed. These two dogs have their own sibling rivalry. It may be because they aren’t always together, so they have to establish their relationship all over again when we come here.

Ginger is the prettiest little beagle, with reddish brown spots over her body, black saddle, and a cute little white muzzle with a white strip running up to the top of her head. Sweet dog. Chaz, a Shi-Tzu/Pomeranian, is mostly white, with a pale beige colored saddle. He has beautiful round black eyes that ‘pop’ out of his white face. Chaz is 3 years old, and still wants to get into everything. Curious dog. Ginger is a squirrel hunter. Ginger probably weighs 25 pounds, while Chaz weighs around 13. Ginger is definitely the ‘boss’ in this relationship.

Today I got to talk to my son James. I love talking to him on the phone, though it was cut short by a conference call . He’s so smart and capable and has been so successful. Very proud of him. Proud of both kids, of course. Today he just gets the attention lol. He and his family are going to be moving to Texas from the DC area, and are looking forward to it. There’s a lot of work ahead, finding the right schools, the right house, etc.

I have a book to write.

I’m not new in the walk, but I’m new to waiting on Him. I am headstrong, and like to step out on ideas I have. My desire is to learn how to pray and then to wait for Him to show me the answer, instead of barreling ahead. I’ll post any improvements in that area in the future.

One of those nights, when I decide not to take a sleep aid, and wake up after 3-4 hours…I’m writing my book, and it whirls through my head. Memories of my teen years, for some reason, also whirling. Possibly because I just spent time with my H.S. friend Jody.

Recently returned from another writer’s conference, but with much more focused energy than before. My health is good, and I’m jazzed about writing.

Our very good friends, Wayne and Debbie Macomber,  just lost their youngest son, Dale, to suicide. Our hearts ache for them, and wish we could be there to offer hugs, shoulders, and fun memories.

Suicide hurts. I lost my niece Michelle almost 9 years ago, and only recently have I stopped wondering what I could have done differently. She lived with us briefly when she was a young troubled teen, and so often I would go back in my memories and wonder if we were wrong to let her go back home.

But that’s simply torment. I think though, with death, and especially suicide, you can’t help but let thoughts go in that direction, at least if you had been in a parental mode as we were. I can’t say I experienced what Wayne and Debbie are going through, but I can empathize. My prayers for them are that they can push through this on the cushion of thousands and thousands of prayers that are being lifted up for them.

Really hot! in the high 80′s low 90′s. Luckily we belong to the Y and the kids have swim lessons every day. So I go early and work out for an hour in the cool water. But this is new, and my knee is sore!

Elijah has a Wii and loves to take action pictures. He shows them to me, and some of them are pretty cool. But he’s running out of room, and needs an SD card. Nana to the rescue.

Going to head home today sometime. After my Costco run. I can’t wait to be in my own home….

I have a small dog, Pomeranian/Shi-Tzu. Very cute. Very high energy, even at the age of almost 3.

This morning he had a piece of rawhide, and frantically ran to and fro, looking for just the perfect spot to lay down and chew on it. Poor guy was unable to perch, until I got him a new bone. It must’ve restarted his brain, and now he’s on the couch, happily chewing away.

I got him as a 6 week old pup. His mother, the Pomeranian, had tragically died when he and his litter mates were 3 weeks old. I didn’t know then, but I know now, that made a bit of a difference in his behavior. To this day, he doesn’t like to be on his back, and never ever rolls to display his tummy (submission). When I scratch his tummy, he leans, sort of half way. Otherwise, though, he’s an adorable little dog. Great companion.

I was kind of  ‘not well’ for several years, and finally found out what the problem was. In the meantime, my house became hopelessly cluttered. These past few months I’ve been helping my daughter at her house for half the month and coming home the other half. Gradually, I’ve been clearing some stuff out.

Today I’m finishing a painting project that has been on hold for so long I have to re-stir the paint I bought. Hoping to finish it, get the new vanity ordered, and clear out the spare room for number 1 grandkid’s upcoming visit.

I’d love to figure out how to get rid of the nasty comments that attach themselves to my posts.

I need motivation. hmmmm…having a friend who is consistently #1 on NYT best seller list, who just signed an 8 million dollar contract, that’s not motivation?

Freedom from fear of success.

Wisdom to finish what I start (knitting projects also)

When I write I am content, joyful, jazzed.

Good intentions, such as committing to the November Nanowrimo, have fallen by the wayside. Thanksgiving has come and gone and was wonderful, with our entire family plus Jodi and her girls and Scott enjoying a delicious turkey cooked by James.

Now it’s December, and my shopping has, so far, been almost exclusively online. Sent gifts to Brianna and Dillon already, and have James’ wish list. Maddie’s will also probably be sent from online. If I purchase gifts here, and send them, it costs over $30 and that money can be used better for something substantial. Shipping does cost from online orders also, but Amazon has that wonderful free shipping deal and I take advantage of it!

My granddaughter Chloe came up to me the other day. “Nana, guess what I figured out?” “What, Chloe?” “That God isn’t just a boy, he’s also a girl!”

She’s almost 8 and has figured it out on her own – also figured out that God and Santa are a lot alike, except God is real! Love my grandkids.

This is only my second conference, and I seem to be creating a habit of missing workshops, in the hope they will be recorded and I can listen to them later.

I have discovered that there are some essential things I need to bring to a writer’s conference, and here is the list:

1. Business Card – must-have for networking with fellow writers. I met many people who gave me their cards, and was very sad I had nothing to give back.
2. Healthy Snacks – for the down times in my room when I’m hungry and the silly  hotel has no snack refrigerator or microwave.
3. Additional Notepad – the program probably gives you room in the back to take notes, but I prefer having them all consolidated in one  notebook.
4. Can-Do Attitude – listen to all the encouragement available to you from fellow writer/dreamers, workshop leaders, and keynote speakers. This conference is to help me get motivated and become a better writer.

My first post on my website! And I’m looking forward to getting my act together.